I have been long conducting a research on my own–what affect one’s feeling of being secure? (What are the influencers of one’s emotional security?) Or maybe I have wrote about this topic before in my blog.
I already had an answer but I’m afraid it’s inadequate for this convoluted question.
Psychology should have explored this area of knowledge already, yet I can’t find anything useful.
Security is a basic human instinct, it’s a sense that alarms us whether there is danger or not.
The sense of pursuing secure pushes us to where we are today–we formed villages across the land, cities that produce prosperity and nations that unite an entire people.
Feeling secure is a basic need of humans.
However, what make us feel secure? What are the actual influencers in our common life that control or twist the feelings of us being secure?
The number one thing is trust–the first answer came into my mind. The mutual commodity between man and man.
Trust can cover so many areas, to which all of them can link to one’s sense of not being threatening.
Trust makes us feel safe. The trust towards your partner knowing that he/she won’t betray you makes you sleep tight at night; the trust towards your neighbors knowing that they are good people makes you walk freely in the neighborhood; the trust towards your friends knowing that they’ll help you in need makes you love to see them……
Trust binds us together. This is one of the main reasons we feel secure, especially in a strange environment.
When you’re in a strange environment, the first thing you seek is familiarities. Because things you’re familiar with produce trust in you, it makes you feel safe, even though sometimes the trust can be unreal and artificial. But still, you need that thing to tell you this is not a complete different place from the previous one, and you know how to encounter these seemingly new things correctly. The sense of being secure.
Common people seek security constantly, that’s why they are all pretty conservative and non-risktakers. Adventurers are risk takers, but do they feel secure?
In nature adventurers do not feel secure, as they feel secure they would not explore. The thing drives them to venture forth is the insecurity of current conditions, the desire to fulfill the current void in their hearts.
CEOs are adventurers, entrepreneurs are adventurers, political leaders are adventurers. People that bring changes to the world don’t feel secure, it’s the insecurity that drives them to change.
When a leader meets a risk, there are two situations. First is blind confidence, this confidence can compensate the person’s insecurity a little bit but can’t really ease off his insecurity. Second is rational confidence, the person knows what he’s going to achieve and sacrifice. This confidence boosts the person’s security tremendously.
Knowledge is also a form of trust, the trust towards yourself.
So let’s review the answer a little bit. Basically, the one main reason towards one’s emotional security is trust. Trust can break down to multiple definitions. First, is general trust. Second, familiarity. Third, confidence. Fourth, rational confidence/knowledge.
However, there are more to emotional security.
Feeling safe is a function in our brain, some cortex functions, or inside. This is the current knowledge I got.
Also, other things can influence emotional security as well. A person’s belief, his religious beliefs or faiths etc. can genuinely give the person tranquility, which is also a form of security. A much higher form. People that pursue religious beliefs always find themselves having a better balance than other people. Religions in some way give these people power to stay calm and stay secure. Buddhism, Christianity or even Islam have given its believers faiths to feel safe.
If you have ever encountered a devout Christian, the amount of calmness emits from this person and you can just sense it. So calm that you know he’s firm believer of Jesus Christ. And instabilities that us common people need to face everyday can not rob off this person’s faith.
Religions sometimes work marvel on desperate people who are in emergency of security. Either it’s necessities, or breakdowns. Religions give the person salvation towards himself and the outside world. It creates this sense security inside the person. This can be called as a form of trust, because it’s a form of trust towards supernaturalism, believing in something nonexistent and superior than you.
I’m still doing research on this subject and it has been along for quite some years now. I would update this post if new information comes up.
Another attribute to emotional security is knowing you are loved, you are cared.
On the sickbed I have endured a significant amount of anxiety, I haven’t had security for a long time with my parents, they rob off my security.
However in the time of me being on my sickbed, the nurse lady who cares about my conditions, the nurses genuinely care about my body, and the doctors who are so gentle and caring to me. Plus my mother and my father come to me once a day and my grandma tells me that I’m just having a poor body conditions. All of this helps sooth my nerve. Thanks for them I think I somehow retain some security back, which really helps.
Knowing you are really loved, and cared, is definitely a big attribute for emotional security.