It’s been two months since I left China.
The country has done some significant damage to me. And I feel like right I am forced to forget all of those things in order to set myself to the right track.
However, the damage is dealt, it’s impossible to erase what they have done to me. The time wasted, the money lost, the health damaged and the mind traumatized.
I tried the method a counsellor told me, to ignore the negative thoughts of China and my parents, but as far as I’m concerned, it’s really just a buffering method. The hatred hasn’t dissipated, it just stays inside the subconscious forever. I still hate China, I still hate my parents, I still hate whoever harmed me because of their selfishness in the visa event.
And I believe there is going to be revenge on these people as well, they need to pay for whatever they did to me, I’m going to make them suffer.
For the past two months, it’s been extremely hard for me to go through. Isolated, extreme lack of help, not even my friend that I made previously here helped me.
Most problems are legacy problems that don’t have solutions here whatsoever, most of the problems should have been fixed in China. And these problems were man made. Karma wouldn’t do this to me, evil human beings would do this to me. And that was exactly the situation happened back in China. It was fucked up.
I’m still angry, but not so much anymore. But it’s impossible to cover up the evil acts those fuckers done to me.
My own parents want to eat me, they want to chip away my individualities, the only thing they give a shit is money.
The agents who did this job were even dirtier, they would sacrifice a baby’s health in order to get the job done. And with situations like this, the outcome was still very shitty, really low quality.
For my father’s friend, the only thing he cares about is also money. Since he and my father are essentially the same, both egoistic, prickish and obsessed with money. He took away also a great chunk of mental energy of mine just to keep his money intact.
All of these things have made the whole operation extremely unsuccessful and hard to get done. Everybody wanted a piece of me, and everybody did whatever the fuck they can to take away as much of mine as possible from me.
And the end result is that this whole going abroad thing has come to an end.
As the housing problem has stalled me for a month and a half, and the sleeping problem has yet to be fixed, health is still not recovering study is left behind.
All because of the pieces of shit back in China did these things to me.
It’s unbelievable to even think about going back to that country.
How can you go back to a country that can’t even speak out your mind? How can you go back to a country that privacy isn’t simply a thing? How can you go back to a country where people simply are evil and everybody cherishes not the smartest in the crowd, but the chameleon? The kind of person that switches his face whenever possible to suffice his needs, in order to gain personal benefits from whomever he encounters?
How can you go back to a country where businesses are not about fair competition, but about harming each other so much till both sides stop operating anymore? It’s literally animal behaviors in a country where people try to skin alive everybody else and eat them. It’s killing, and eating, and killing. It’s not about winning, it’s about killing another person and take away his stuff and eat his body, just so you are probably in luck to stay alive till the next morning. It’s a dark society where there is no foreseeable hope whatsoever, it’s a self-destructing system that’s been in place since the foundation of the country. Its end is a collapse.
I see many disgusting Chinese traits from my parents, they are the losers of this society. They are not even mainstream people. They are pretty fucked up people, uneducated, distasteful and selfish pieces of garbage. I hate them so much for all the problems they brought me and lent no help to me during my upbringing.
China is fucked up, so do my parents.
Again, look at the Canadian system, I see nothing but an inefficient, slow and bureaucratic system.
Start with healthcare, it’s an appointment based system. To determine whether a healthcare system is effective, a hospital’s return rate can be a good indicator.
How often does a patient return to a hospital? Does he return for the same issue? Or something the previous visit did not solve? Or that the previous visit has caused some new symptoms?
Whether a healthcare system is effective can manifest on the return rates of the hospitals. Are doctors good enough? Are they professional in dealing with specific diseases? Is the system practicing standard procedures so there will be no future damage to patients?
When you return to a hospital, it’s usually:
- Your problem still persists, the last visit didn’t solve the problem completely; it didn’t treat the problem properly; it didn’t cure the symptoms.
- The last visit neglected some problems, they only treated one, but not the others.
- The last visit created new problems for you, your problems have become worse.
In terms of a country’s prosperity, the infrastructures lay the foundation of how a country functions. Whether it’s good, or bad, can all be traced to the basics. Healthcare, education, transportation, government bodies, and other public services.
For an appointment based system, things can get really slow. And when things become slow, problems become complicated because you couldn’t solve it in a speedy manner. Time, is everything. Time can increase the difficulty of a problem, or simplify a problem.
A country that runs on time, but also a country that doesn’t really understand time.
Being efficient isn’t all about being fast, but about how to cleverly manage and maneuver resources, in order to achieve the maximum quality in a limited timeframe.
Being on time is a good habit, but as far as I see it, a lot of time is wasted on the waiting line. Standing in a line, 45 minutes have passed and you can’t do anything else but to wait in the line.
Waiting has taken away far too much valuable time to do something creative and productive.
That’s why Canada is slow and inefficient. Because you wait, to get something done.
But here’s an interesting question, what would you get in the end? Is the two months waiting period worth it for your chronic problem? Would you get what you need in the end?
Let’s imagine a scenario where waiting isn’t a real factor. When you try to solve a problem, there’s an order of ABCDEFG. If there’s waiting in it, then the order becomes A-B-C-D-E-F-G, because waiting exponentially increases the distance between each point, and also the complexity and difficulty.
And in life, a problem doesn’t solve it by itself. So when we come up with a solution, it’s never a home run on the first try. The order of ABCDEFG doesn’t mean you can solve the problem, it means you have come up with a solution. So in this case, if this solution can’t solve the problem, you need HIJKLMN. And that takes away another chunk of time for you to solve it. And when the waiting factor is added, the time that takes to solve the problem becomes exponentially long.
From 3 days, to 2 months, sometimes to years.
The problem is that people don’t take time into the equation of how a problem becomes worse or better. People perceive time as it is, but doesn’t understand how time affects problems.
And what about the paperworks then? When you need to do something politically, there is this gigantic bureaucratic system lying in front of you, what would you do? Unnecessary bureaucracy only creates troubles and complexity for life, it takes away time, and consumes energy. It’s as unnecessary as it can be.