Monitor my opinion shift

I want to monitor my opinion shift to see if there is any opinions changed drastically because I need to take different actions, or choosing different side.

Because there is only one truth, as we all know that the higher stage rationality goes, the narrower the path becomes and more unified it is.

I am going to give myself a set of words to see if my opinions have shifted drastically over time, and in many cases, it could be false perceptions. ...READ MORE

Stability and Risk

Customize as much as you can to put yourself at the 2%, all of your actions should be built towards customizations and putting yourself at the 2% basket.

But have a plate under you that puts you in the 60-70% basket, in case you fail.

I am not sure how this is actually going to lay out in the reality, I don’t know the exact steps I need to undertake to make some system as flexible like this.

You either be risky, or stable. Choose one. There is no middle ground. Middle ground usually leads to being unstable and nothing like both. ...READ MORE

Body Conditions

I feel like ever since the 2018 hospital incident, my health conditions haven’t been good.

Most of the times I have no idea what’s going on in my body and why do I have all the previously never seen strange behaviors.

At this moment, it’s quite clear that my body is yet again fucked.

And other than waiting for it to recover, there is not much I can do.

OF course, I want to finish what ì started. But I’m afraid I don’t have the means to do it anymore. ...READ MORE

In Terms of Learning Music

Music is not that hard to learn.

By being in Vancouver, I met some really good teachers. Adam and Dave are the teachers that really, just, I believe in many ways, good.

And in terms of music theory, it isn’t a hard subject to learn. Compare to math, physics, subjects that can transcend into very complicated areas, music is actually easy to learn.

I met many talented producers amongst me, and I believe they have this thing with music. The “it” factor. ...READ MORE

Journal after a while on Canada, and China and freedom

I find, the cost of problem solving is simply too huge to afford in Canada.

Canada is slow, inefficient. This leads into the fabrics of how every single thing functions in that society.

When it’s slow and inefficient, the cost of problem solving goes up exponentially, it makes everything hard to flow through.

People there treat wait time as a nuisance, an annoyance, something that can be tolerated. But most of them don’t care about the cost of problem solving, how much it’s going to cost and how long is it going to take. ...READ MORE

Looking at China and Canada

It’s been two months since I left China.

The country has done some significant damage to me. And I feel like right I am forced to forget all of those things in order to set myself to the right track.

However, the damage is dealt, it’s impossible to erase what they have done to me. The time wasted, the money lost, the health damaged and the mind traumatized.

I tried the method a counsellor told me, to ignore the negative thoughts of China and my parents, but as far as I’m concerned, it’s really just a buffering method. The hatred hasn’t dissipated, it just stays inside the subconscious forever. I still hate China, I still hate my parents, I still hate whoever harmed me because of their selfishness in the visa event. ...READ MORE

Different Systems Produce Different Results

After these few months, I feel quite exhausted as how things have unfolded.

As of now, the visa is in progress, however, I might not even have it on time before first day in college.

Who’s gonna take the blame? Whose responsibility is this? Every one who took part inside this operation has shown an extreme obnoxious side of themselves. And I have to bear the consequence… Fucking why?

My parents love to just not give it all in, stalling, holding, doing what they do best to undermine the process and cut down the quality. Giving half the price and ask people to do twice the job. ...READ MORE